Welcome to the archived web site of
Will Joel Friedman, Ph.D. Psychologist (1950-2013)
California License No. PSY 10092
Specializing in Presence-Centered Therapy
balancing mind and heart, body and spirit

Now in memoriam - This website is no longer being updated
While Dr. Friedman is no longer with us, there are still many helpful resources on his site. Articles and resource links have been relocated to the top. His family hopes you might find them helpful. But since this site is no longer being updated, some links may no longer work.


Articles by Dr. Friedman
Video and Audio Clips
Annotated Resource Links
Psychology Professionals

Dr. Will’s Perspective on Practicing Psychology:

Dr. Friedman's Practice
Dr. Friedman's Approach
Therapeutic Purposes
Credentials | Experience
Brochures | Interview
Events and Workshops

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Articles by Dr. Friedman (except where noted otherwise)

Categorized by Process | Topic

From His Book | Meditations For Life | The Flow of Money, Business and Innovation | Transpersonal/Mind-Body | Approaches, Worldview and Will-isms

Skills For Life: The Core Playing Field | Free the Ego, and You Are Free | Feeling, Thought, Communication & Action

Strategies/Distinctions For Life: The Core Playing Field | Free the Ego, and You Are Free

Awakening Stories/Metaphors For Life: The Core Playing Field | Free the Ego, and You Are Free | The Way It Is

Holiday Family Gatherings | Cartoons, Jokes and Humor | Poems and Quotes | Song Lyrics, Wit and Wisdom


COMPLETE LIST OF ARTICLES by Topic | Show by Process

About Therapy and Approaches

True Psychology, Therapy and Healing—A Radical and Revolutionary Endeavor

Research on the Effectiveness of Therapy and How Therapy Can Change Brain Structure

Building Strong Internal Resources—A Key to Well Being

Peeling the Onion—Uncovering Our Wounds in Therapy

Deconstruct Non-Adaptive Self-Judgments, Including Beliefs, False Identities, Roles and Stories NEW

Truth and Love—Liberated Heads and Radiant Hearts

Return to the Loving Hearth: Integrating Universal Spirituality into a Healing Psychotherapy

The Benefits of Suffering and the Costs of Well Being—Secondary Gains and Losses

Questions to Live By

Healing Stories

Three Views of Self-Hypnosis (with Elizabeth Erickson and Eleanor S. Field, Ph.D.)

Collaborative Divorce—Shendl Tuchman, Psy.D. and Will Joel Friedman, Ph.D.

Books and Resources Worth Exploring


Harmlessness and Cleaning Up Harm

Being an Outstanding Steward of Life Itself—What We Can Learn From Animals

Dog Prose poem—A High Watermark—Author Unknown

Awash in Harm, Do No More Harm

Clean Up Harm, Mistakes, Snafus, and Screw-ups- Recognition, Responsibility, Commitment, Repair & Release NEW

Complacency, Apathy and Resignation Be Banished and Transformed—Awakening to Reality Won't Tolerate Anything Less Than Truth, Vision & Action NEW

Sometimes We Must Fight, But Let's Know When

Our True Self—Our Reason For Being

Harmless: Everywhere With Everyone—A Supportive Mediation

The True Cost of Healing a Wound

Catch a "Wild Pitch?"—You Must Be Kidding!

The Evolution of Our Species

Taking 42 Human Birthrights, Living 13 Social Responsibilities


Money, Business, and Innovation

A Core Vision for Business Consulting—A Baker's Dozen Principles—Skill Sets for Effective and Sustainable Results NEW

Claiming the Well Being You Are—Transforming Your Relationship to Money

The Architecture of All Change Processes: It's as Simple as 1-Point, 2-Points, 3-Points and 4+Points NEW

Being Outside of the Box—Author Unknown

Social Traps and Beyond: The Situation is Hopeless But Not Serious
The Nonsensical Ineffectiveness of Win-Loss / Zero-Sum Games
& the Eloquent Adaptiveness of Win-Win / Non-Zero-Sum Games NEW

Forms of Innovation—Strategies for Success-Goals

That's Unreasonable!—You Bet!

Two Great Experiments to Establish a New Habit—Pointers to a Proactive, Consciously Evolving Life



For Valentine's Day, Give Mature Love

It's Mother's Love—Stand Aside!

Easter Renewal—Rebirth Available To All

Freedom Means Little Without Will To Use It

Take Out Scare, Put Care In Halloween Celebration

Thanksgiving—Let Holiday Ignite Awareness of Needs, Commitment to Help

Four Promises of Christmas—Two-Week Miracle Can Last Lifetime

Trade in Those Tired, Unrealistic New Year Resolutions For the Real Thing


It's Shocking How Little People Settle For, How Much They Put Up With and How Much Better They Deserve NEW

Speaking Male, Speaking Female—Communicating Into Another's Listening

Transforming Entangled Involvements into Genuine Relationships

The Greatest Gift a Parent Can Bestow Upon Their Children

King Arthur and the Witch

You are the Gift—Sufi Story

Gandhi Moments—Your Flip-Flop and Eating Sugar

A Mule Called Hiney

Care or Carry

Heaven and Hell (or Big Spoons)

The End of All Arguments

Choice—Level I: Seeing Through Obstacles to Living by Choice

Choice—Level II:: Developing a Workable Structure For Choice

Choice—Level III: The "Will" without a Willful Doer Chooses (Book)


Feelings, Moods and Emotions

A Flat, No Lug Wrench—Author Unknown

Acceptance—Even LESS than Meets the I!

Feeling Sense Makes Sense In the Heart, Not the Head

Straight Feeling Talk: "I Anger Myself", "I Delight Myself"—It's All An Inside Job

Healthy Feeling Processing

Feelings Are Authentic and Valid—Perceptions and Beliefs Are Suspect

Five Emotional Sinkholes and Four Healthy Ways to Express Emotions

The Five Levels of Love

The Sixteen Laws of Emotions—Recognizing Moods and Emotions to Return to Healthy Feeling Processing

Dissolve Frustration—Three Strategies You Can Begin Using Right Now


Thoughts, Obsessions and Compulsions

Beliefs Are Not to Be Believed

What an Apparent Poor Sense of Direction Revealed about the Mind—Believing is Deceiving, While Releasing Believing is Freeing NEW

Critical Thinking is Not Critical, Just Looking For Truth & Reality—The Heart of Asking Questions That Reveal "What Is" NEW

Are Reasons Complete Nonsense?—A Three-Minute Course—Except for Increasing Likelihood of Compliance, Bolstering Optimism, Offering Reassurance and Entertainment Value, Reasons Are a Useless Ego-Mind Exercise NEW

To Identify or Not Identify?—That Is the Question!—Beliefs, Roles and Stories Can Be Useful At Times or Create Suffering; Recognition, Disillusionment, Disidentification & Surrender is Freedom Itself NEW

Twenty-Four Credible, Workable Ideas

Reasons Are Not Truth: Why Are You Riding Your Bicycles?

It's Just Not Fair!—Who Makes All Claims In Life?—Insisting on Fairness & Justice is a Recipe For Conflict, Misery & Suffering NEW

Acknowledgment Transcends Pride and Humility—Deconstructing A Polarity

Stuck Right, Rich Right and Dead Right—No Thank You!

Nothing To Prove and Nothing To Explain

The Three Meanings of "Perfect": Perfectible is Workable—Perfectionism Isn't


Defenses, Passive-Aggressive Behaviors and Setting Limits

Common and Mature Defenses, and Beyond

Developing An Inner Meter on Manipulation—A Critical Life Skill NEW

It's an Inside Job!—Our Misery is Self-Inflicted the Vast Majority of the Time—Transforming Anti-Life, Self-Defeating Behaviors Into Pro-Life, Self-Supportive Ones NEW

What Can I Do?—The Seven Options Available For You In Any Situation—The Ever-Present Opportunity To Inhabit Clarity Reveals Direction NEW

An Inventory of Passive-Aggressive Behaviors

Possible Direct Control—Staying on the Playing Field

What Do You "Have To" Do in Life?

Minding Your Own Business and Leaving 'Nobody's Business' Alone

In Praise of Intolerance—Author Unknown

Psychological Jujitsu / Aikido / Alchemy—"Conversation Stoppers":
Decisively End Conversations From Hell While Remaining Exactly As You Are

Setting Healthy Limits—It Can Be an All-Win!

"Off With Their Heads!"—Danger! Danger! Guillotiners Ahead!—Identifying and Protecting Yourself From Expediency-Driven Guillotiners NEW

Dealing With Difficult People—Persuasive Strategies—Will Joel Friedman, Ph.D. and Kirby Palmer, M.S.W.


Responsibility, Trust, Commitment and Clean Communication

Vern Black's Integrity Tone Scale

Cognitive, Psychosocial, Moral and Faith Development

Recognizing and Working Well with the Unconscious

Adults? Don't Let the Big Bodies Fool You!—Self-Responsibility / Self-Accountability Qualifies You as an Adult NEW

Own Being Responsible?—Absolutely    Make Others Responsible?—You Must Be Kidding!    The End of All Anger, Blame and Resentment, Taking Insult and Offense, Leaning Into Hurt and Abused Reactions NEW

Three Components of a Commitment: A Universal Tool What Qualifies as a Commitment and a Committed Person NEW

TRUST is a Key to Well Being: Four Research Findings

TRUST—Practical Maps and Strategies to Wisely Invest Your Trust

Moralistic and Non-Moralistic Communication

The Grammar of Committed Action: Speaking That Brings Forth Being—Using Fernando Flores' Conversation-For-Action Model To Powerfully Live Your Word NEW

Ladder of Commitment

GROKKED: Being Seen, Heard and Known For Who You Are NEW

Keeping It Real—Do You Get It?: Consciousness Finds Consciousness—Exploring Meta-level Communication and Self-Aware, Conscious, Present Living NEW

Compassion is Healing—Empathy is "Perspective Taking"


Coping Well With Physical Challenges

Stress-Related Diseases: Research-based Prevalence and Patterns

Hypertension: What It Means and What You Can Do About It

Fact Sheet for Couples Experiencing Infertility

The Hammer Theory of Pleasure and Pain—Rediscovering the Wisdom of Moderation


Adaptively Working with Change, Stress and Anxiety

Healthy Change—Moving Through a Skid

Steps Back are Not Setbacks: Finding Solid Ground Can Be Essential NEW

The Structure of Healthy Change—Prochaska and Küblar-Ross

Types of Stress and Their Symptoms

The Top Seven Sources of Stress and Their Remedies

Basics of Living: Breathing, Standing, Walking and Sitting—Safeguards of Well Being and Listening Within NEW

Rule-Bound Adjustment is Deadening— Rule-Flexible Adaptiveness is Enlivening NEW

SUCCESS—Aptitude Plus Attitude Equals Altitude—Author Unknown

The Zeigarnik Effect and Completing Everything

Pattern Recognition: A Key to Success in Doing Anything Well NEW

The Art of Pacing—Live Long and Prosper

It's Far Too Simple (Book)

Saying It's So—Author Unknown (Book)

Saying "Okay" to Everything (Book)

The Hard Way or the Easy Way—The Apparent Choice at the Crossroads of Every Present Moment NEW

Being Positional, Non-Positional and Taking a Stand—Transcending the Ego's Right/Wrong Game and Self-Righteousness

How Socrates Students Chose Themselves (Book)


Presence/Mindfulness and Witnessing

Being Presence Itself: Enliven the Quality of Your Life

The Felt Experience of Awareness Itself NEW

Listening Presence—Transform Your Relationships

The Power of Witnessing—How Would a Fish Know It Is In Water?

Meaning Depends Upon Context, Egos Make Up All the Meanings & the Context of All That's Real is Being Aware of Awareness Itself NEW

Will-isms 1—Observations and Provocations, Warnings and Protections, Realizations and Awarenesses

"Will-ism's" 2—Observations and Provocations, Warnings and Protections, Realizations and Awarenesses NEW

Incessant Drip, Drip, Drip—A Universal Story

Mindfulness 1—Mindfulness of the Breath

Mindfulness 2—Mindfulness of Your Senses

Mindfulness 3—Mindfulness of Emotions/Mindfulness of Thoughts and Images

Mindfulness 4—Mindfulness of Not Being Present/Being "Tuned Out" or Dissociated

Harmless: Everywhere With Everyone—A Supportive Mediation

Keeping "C-L-E-A-R" HEALTH—A Supportive Meditation

Keeping A "C-L-E-A-R" HEAD—A Supportive Meditation

Your Healing Place of Comfort—A Supportive Meditation

Higher Skyward You Do Aspire—Deeper Grounded You Need Desire

Accessing Your Genius—A Supportive Meditation

Accessing Your Musical Genius—A Supportive Meditation

Our True Self: Our Reason For Being—A Supportive Meditation

The "Ebb and Flow" of Wellness—A Supportive Meditation

Supremely Safe—A Supportive Meditation

Sanctuary—A Supportive Meditation


Revealing and Freeing the Ego-Mind

Seeing Three Domains—Illusory, Empirical World, and Absolute (Book)

Withdraw Attention, Interest and Feeding Unhappy Thoughts, and Natural Happiness Arises and Blossoms NEW

Two Wolves—Author Unknown

Questions Egos Use and Questions to Reveal Egos (Book)

"Seeing Through" the Ego's Fantasy-Reality Gap

The Ego's Way of Handling the Now

Four Cardinal Understandings and Services of the Ego (Book)

Mottos of the Ego-Mind

Three Favorite Ego Games


Reality and What is Real

How Reality Works—One Slice & Take Into the Pie of Just the Way It Is NEW

Immersed in a Sea of Zen Masters—An Adaptation in the Tradition of Zen Buddhism NEW

A Map of the World

Question "What is" and Doubt "What Isn't" NEW

Another Opinion

Tickets To Paradise—A Good-hearted Tale

What Do You Think You're Doing?!—A True Story

Toto's Wisdom (Book)

Learned Craziness or Original Sanity (Book)

Seeing Through the Unreal Reveals the Real (Book)

Elusive Time, Nonexistent Time, and Timelessness NEW

Mind Is...


Release, Surrender and See What Remains

N E E D L E S S—You Can Have Almost Anything Almost Anything You Want (So Long As You Don't Need It!)—Free From the Imaginary Ego's Relentless Neediness, You Are Free (Book) NEW

Garbage Detection and Brilliance Spotting

Surrendering False Identities

My Cup Overflows (Book)

The Powerful Locomotive

The Ascent to the Peak (Book)

Freeing the Sculpture From the Stone (Book)

A Beautiful Mind—Saying Goodbye to What Cannot Be True (Book)

God's Playin' Games With My Heart, Again—Reggie Evans (Book)

Maya (Book)


Universal Spirituality and Inspiration

Will's Five Dynamic Laws of the Universe

The Grand Banquet

The Dynamic Laws of Healing—A Summary—Dr. Christiane Northrup

Discovering Love in the Face of Imminent Death

The Fun House of Mirrors—Seeing Light in Everyone (Book)

An Autobiography in Five Short Chapters—Portia Nelson

A Well Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

All Are the Best Sanctuaries (Book)

"I AM"—Divine Qualities Have No Opposite, Only Absence (Book) NEW

Faithing—A Vision Alive and Present

A Walking, Talking, Breathing Miracle—Y-O-U! A One-In-Several-Billion Shot

You Don't Know How Good You Have It—It Could Always Be Worse!

The Great Equalizers of Life

I Am There—James Dillet Freeman

Symptoms of Inner Peace and Joy

Awakening Stories For Life 1

Awakening Stories For Life 2

Awakening Stories For Life 3

Awakening Stories For Life 4

Awakening Stories For Life 5

Awakening Stories For Life 6 NEW



Cartoons For Life 1

Cartoons For Life 2

Cartoons For Life 3

Cartoons For Life 4

Cartoons For Life 5

Cartoons For Life 6

Cartoons For Life 7

Cartoons For Life 8 NEW

Cartoons For Life 9 NEW

Cartoons For Life 10 NEWEST

Cartoons For Life 11 NEWEST

Jokes and Humor For Life 1

Jokes and Humor For Life 2

Jokes and Humor For Life 3

Jokes and Humor For Life 4

Jokes and Humor For Life 5

Jokes and Humor For Life 6 NEW

Jokes and Humor For Life 7 NEW

The World According to Mark Twain

The World According to Mae West

The World According to G. K. Chesterton

The World According to W.C. Fields

The World According to Groucho Marx

The World According to Woody Allen

The World According to Yogi Berra

The World According to Bill Cosby

The World According to Lily Tomlin

The World According to Steve Martin

The World According to George Carlin

The World According to Robin Williams

The World According to John Hodgman and Jonathan Winters

The World According to Jon Steward

The World According to Lewis Black

The World According to Stephen Colbert

The World According to Margaret Cho

The World According to Steven Wright


Poetry, Song Lyrics, and Quotes

The World According to World-Class Satirists NEW

Wit and Wisdom For Life 1

Wit and Wisdom For Life 2

Poetry For Life 1

Poetry For Life 2

Poetry For Life 3

Poetry For Life 4

Poetry For Life 5

Poetry For Life 6

Poetry For Life 7

Poetry For Life 8 NEW

Poetry For Life 9 NEW

Poetry For Life 10 NEW

Comes the Dawn (After A While)—Veronica A. Shoffstall

Song Lyrics For Life—Classics 1

Song Lyrics For Life—Children's Songs 1

Song Lyrics For Life—Love, Love and Love 1

Song Lyrics For Life—Comforting and Reassuring 1

Song Lyrics For Life—Fun and Funniest 1

Song Lyrics For Life—Wisest Songs 1

Song Lyrics For Life—The Cutting Edge 1

Song Lyrics For Life—Spirituality and Oneness 1

The World According to Bruce Lee NEW

Quotes For Life 1

Quotes For Life 2

Quotes For Life 3

Quotes For Life 4

Quotes For Life 5

Quotes For Life 6

Quotes For Life 7

Quotes For Life 8 NEW

Quotes For Life 9 NEW


George Demont Otis        Mahbra Moutains

© Copyright 2013 by Will Joel Friedman, Ph.D.

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